Adam Kostial died suddenly two years ago on Dec. 5. But for his mother, family and two siblings, it might as well have been yesterday.

"Waking up in the morning is tough," says his mother, Amy Pozycki, a former Moon Area High School teacher.

"Just getting through the day is difficult. He had everything going for him. It's not fair."

Some days it's hard to see a bright side or believe life ever could be normal without her eldest son, who died too young from a brain aneurysm.

One positive result mildly comforts her. Because of Adam's unexpected death, four people lived longer.

"We knew we had to donate his organs. It would have been a waste. He was 21. He had been perfectly healthy his whole life, I didn't think for a minute not to do it."

Adam was among thousands who donate organs in the United States each year, and his family is one of the many left hurting.

In the Pittsburgh area, Good Grief Center of Homestead keeps tabs on more than 150 bereavement support groups that offer comfort to grieving families and friends, according to Lulu Orr, the center's executive director.

"We want people to know the goal is not to get over it. It is to get through it and everyone does that in their own time. It is a very individualized process," Orr says.

Support groups range from specific -- parents losing an infant child -- to broad -- dealing with the loss of a loved one.

Seeking the right one out may be difficult.

"In finding a support group, if you go to a group and it doesn't feel right, go to another one. You never know."

And common misconceptions hinder some people.

"With the death of child, it's not something someone who has not walked in those shoes can judge. When people have someone in their family die, people need to say less.

"Especially if it's a child, the main message is there is no timeline for grief. I believe that when somebody loses a child that timeline extends further than any type of loss."

Adam, who attended Allard Elementary School and Moon Area Middle School before transferring and graduating from Quaker Valley, was away at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute.

The lifelong hockey fan and Pi Lambda Phi fraternity brother was double-majoring in computer and systems engineering and computer science at the Troy, N.Y. technical university.

He dreamed of creating a software company to rival Apple and Microsoft. His best friend now will have to fulfill that dream alone.

Early on a Saturday morning, a week after he visited his parents' Edgeworth home for Thanksgiving, he walked down a flight of stairs.

Suddenly, his eyes grew large as he looked at a few friends, and he collapsed, falling to the bottom of the stairs. He was taken to the hospital, and his family joined him within hours.

Throughout Amy's drive, she did not know the extent of Adam's problems and assumed he would awaken.

Upon arrival at an Albany hospital's intensive care unit, she learned of the aneurysm and its damage. Adam died two days later. The family agreed to donate his heart, kidneys and liver.

"It was a tragic thing to happen to our family. I felt by his death several people could live," says Amy.

His heart recipient, No. 1 on the list, lived a week longer. His liver recipient, a mother of seven, held on for another month, spending precious time with her children.

The kidneys were split between two recipients, a middle-aged woman and Katie, a teenage girl.

"She sent a nice letter (telling me) about her problems, thanking me and saying she'll always remember," Amy says.

"I'm glad for her and her family. She should be able to live a normal life."

Though Amy has called the transplant organization to check on Katie, who is thriving, communicating directly with her has proved too much.

"I do think about her all the time. I've started 15 letters to her. I just can't finish them," Amy says.

Eventually, she hopes to meet Katie.

For now, Amy still visits Adam at his grave four to six times a week.

"I can't imagine not going. If I am away a week, it just bothers me."

Though she imagines altering the past, donating Adam's organs would not be a change she would make.

"They are no good to your son or daughter. There is absolutely no reason you shouldn't be an organ donor. If you can help one person live, it's worth it."

For more information on Good Grief Center www.goodgriefcenter.org or call 412-461-1776.